When we take an
adventure and plan a relocation from our home country to a foreign land we are
so excited we generally focus on positive experiences – the learnings we will
have, the places we will go, the great people we will meet and the fabulous
food we will savour. However, becoming
an expat does have its hardships or personal stretches, I like to call
them. Over time and reflection these stretches lift
our personal growth and offer a positive change within us -- we become global
citizens and see the world in a different lens.
Many of us who have
travelled, lived in foreign lands and had great adventures, have spent time
coping with the challenges or immersing ourselves into a new culture. Usually, this is one of the many times I give
thanks to Canada and our culture diversity as there is little we have not
experience in some form in our land either with language, food or culture.
If we are relocating
our home we want to acclimatize ourselves to the change as quickly and as
graciously as possible. We want to be
out and about experiencing the glorious gifts another land, continent and
people can offer us based on the simplicities of a wondrous life. If
you’re making the move from tourist to expat, read on for advice on how to make
the most of your time abroad.
Plan
for the Unknown
It was a hard lesson
for my first relocation as I gain insight and attempt to plan for the
relocation. Lesson from the experience
was we cannot plan for the unknown. Of course, do your research on neighbourhoods
to live, expat resources, cultural customs, and transportation modes in order
to have some sense of what you are walking into before you land on foreign soil
to begin a new expat adventure. The most valuable step I took was to connect
to social media groups and foster friendships in my new home city. I had friends within hours of arriving at the
Green Tea House Inn in Beijing, or had a network of girlfriends when walked out
of King Abdulaziz
International Airport in my abaya. It
was a comforting to know there were people who knew and cared about me as I
ventured out into the unknown.
Having the network of friends offer a safe
place to share insight, learnings and frustration, and most of all, seek advice
as I made the transition and settled in my new home city both in its landscape
and people.
Connect
with People
Learning of a place
can be found in the tourist guidebooks, however to really understand a place
and its people look to locals or your new neighbours to help you settle as a
resident.
Invite a neighbour
over for coffee or a glass or wine (or the appropriate customs of your new
home), or take a colleague for lunch.
The more people your meet the more you will learn of the culture, social
rules and customs of your new home.
Getting to know
people, anywhere, takes time. Let your
new relationships develop and settle naturally and be patient. After a while, your will realize that your have
established yourself in the social network, and have become part of the
community – as long as you stay open and friendly, putting yourself out there
to share a conversation or offer a helping hand if the opportunity arises. We need a connection to people from home. It helps with our emotional adjustment to our
new home. Go to the expat clubhouses,
Embassy events, and restaurants and foster relationships with native speakers
who share similar ideals, and values. Although they will share insight and
value to your transition, the gifts will come from the unexpected. Smile and be open to it.
Establish
a Routine
Routines make us feel safe. They are
important to our adjustment as we find our way in a new home. It’s taking small steps so people will see
you. Add to the routine each week, as it
will keep you flexible and open to the opportunities, which arise to connect to
the place and people.
My favourite city in
the world is Paris and for my forty and fabulous birthday I was given a flat
for enjoy for a time. I loved it. My command
of French was far stronger in reading and writing, however with my regular
routine of stopping into the local café for my breakfast, or picking up
groceries, over time I was able to build a connection through smiling,
connecting with people and building my confidence to speak French. I wasn’t an unknown to the local retailers,
and I felt comfortable by the end of the first week of my arrival.
Keep a part of your
routine from home. It will make the
transition easier too. You have to be able to connect to your past life in
order to move forward in your new life.
Continue your yoga or mediation or if you are a runner go explore. Take
up a dance class, or enroll in a language program. It’s a great way to learn and most of finding
the connection with people and the place in order to build a new life.
Walk
Explore your new city by walking it. There are endless opportunities build the
connection and savour the beauty of the landscape, streets, history and culture
If walking becomes
part of your routine it will help support your transition, learning of the new
city, however if you are in a place where the personal stretch is causing
grief, walking helps the soul heal – walking
will make you happy! Walking my
golden retriever, Maple in a compound Jeddah offer wonderful gifts both in
building friendships with people around the world, as well as connect to the
nature through the never-ending date trees and beautiful array of flowers.
To
Be
Taking an adventure is a perfect opportunity to rid of an inner mask of what is
expected, and what you really, wish to be. It is to cleanse of expectations and
find your inner peace and be happy with the moment rather than planning for
next year.
It is an ideal time
to kick a bad habit like smoking because shifting daily patterns makes it
easier, or it helps rid ourselves of other devices such as a television, which can
numb us from the experience.
Follow
the Customs
Embrace change as it surrounds you when you decide to be an expat for a time. Embrace
the customs of your new home. Although
fitting our old customs into our new life brings immediate safety and comfort
in the long term it will lead to frustration and isolation.
If you live in a
place where it is now customary to eat dinner at 10pm, eat dinner at 10pm. Make the most of it, and incorporate local
customs into your life. It will make you
happier and the experience far richer.
Lori Ann Comeau is a career coach for the education profession, founder and president of Tulip Canada of boutique of recruitment services to support both the education community and the profession. For advice on filling an employment role submit a job spec here. If you are interested in a teaching adventure please submit a resume here. Follow her on twitter at @tulipcanada or Facebook.
